insomnia

I have a sleeping problem.

My standards of normalcy are what people might consider troublesome, unhealthy... to the point that I actually might need "help".

While I don't quite see the harm in falling asleep at odd hours of the night (or day), I won't deny that my severe lack of a "healthy" sleeping pattern does indeed take a toll on my psyche somewhat.

I just need another routine added on to my current one to balance things out.

change could be good

i set a goal for myself,
that when i eventually get a job, i'd get a new phone.
preferably a blackberry.
crackberry.
again.
LO AND BEHOLD.
the time has come.
but i need to prioritize.

BAH

we'll see.

that guy on that Lupe Fiasco dude's song

Thought I'd take it upon myself to put a name to that voice.

Matthew Santos.

( matthew santos . com )

He commands your attention in more ways than one: his vocal range is incredible, he's a good looking guy, and... whatever, you just need to see him live when or if you can.

if you’re filipino and don’t already know about him, shame on you.

I actually saw and heard him perform live with Lupe Fiasco when my sister and I went to see Kanye West in San Jose during the 2008 Glow in the Dark Tour (with N.E.R.D & Rihanna), and tonight - all thanks to my sister again - at The Mint along Pico Blvd. as Trevor Hall's opening act. 

Matthew at The Mint performing w/ Annalisa
10-10-10

I was flabbergasted with my sister's mention of how very few Filipinos are familiar with a musical compatriot, given his style and heritage. Okay, so he may only be part Filipino, but the fact that he keeps SANTOS in his stage name should be enough reason for Pinoys to identify with the guy and be proud of the connection.

Am I right? or am I RIGHT? and I don't think Matthew would be opposed to the idea of doing gigs in the PI either.


One thing's for sure, neither Lupe Fiasco or Matthew Santos get as much recognition and hype as they deserve. Matthew's musical style, however, takes on a totally different sound and feel from what you hear him doing with Lupe...  more laid back, oftentimes swoon-worthy...


No proper words could describe how much talent is packed into this guy. In a league of his own, you can’t compare him to John Mayer or Jason Mraz or Jack Johnson, he’s just… Matthew Santos. he takes your breath away and, if you happen to catch a show on this current tour, Annalisa will too.


Annalisa Nutt - My Remedy (Matthew Santos cover)

Annalisa Nutt joined Matthew Santos on tour after he found a video of her piano rendition of his song "My Remedy". He describes her as having the "voice of an angel" and it's not far from the truth. There's an ethereal quality to her voice, so positively haunting, and coupled with Matthew's musical prowess, you actually feel yourself being whisked away.

Lame? Yup. Told you I didn't have proper words.

entrepreneur/mastermind/inventor

It baffles me how people are able to conjure up ideas the way they do.

Everyone wants to make a lasting impression some time in their life in hopes of never being forgotten or in hopes of having bettered mankind in some way.

Am I capable of doing such a thing?

musical investment

the new BOSE IE2 audio headphones

I don't know how long it's been since I lost my last pair of earphones. Some months before I managed to misplace those sony earbuds, the wiring in the right or left ear was already shorted out. It was only a matter time until they would be replaced but how I've managed to go without a proper pair is beyond me.

Until this particular long overdue purchase, I'd been relying on my iPod earphones. 

Saying they suck would be an understatement.

The standard iPod earphones are a bane to my music listening experience. Unless I actually press the earbuds so far into my ears that they can almost bang on my eardrums, there really is no way I can enjoy HEARING music. The range of music I listen to requires IMMERSION: a lot of bass, sound isolation,  clarity. It's almost a must to get lost.  and the iPod earphones barely even try to deliver.

Enter, BOSE. Never the brand to disappoint in the audio quality department, they've managed to answer the cries of people who aren't willing to parade around with Bose's best-selling over-ear headphones. 

They take some time growing accustomed to, just as most in-ear headphones do, but just several hours after my purchase and now $100+ short (2-year warranty from Best Buy included) I can earnestly and confidently say they are up to my standards.

I don't expect anything less from a Bose product. 2 years after spending one of my first paychecks on a Bose Portable Sounddock, I still believe in the company and wouldn't even dare sell or give away my speakers.

Bose, Harman Kardon, Sennheiser offer top audio quality. I'm sure of it.

dot. e d u

Remember when Facebook was more about being a college student than it was just.... being?

It was that one other thing besides your college acceptance letter that validated your newfound place in the world. It symbolized a new milestone for people in our generation because it meant that we had graduated from high school, had become adults, and were allowed past doors otherwise ordinary people wouldn't be allowed through.

At that time, our new university student email address something@something.edu was the only possible way we could sign up for this strikingly plain-looking blue and white colored webpage we had caught our older siblings and their friends browsing on their laptops or desktops.

Fast forward several years later and here we are... accepting and/or ignoring friend requests from people who are blatantly unaware of the origins of this internet phenomenon: people who are too young to be accessing the internet, and people that really have no business being there e.g., our parents.

The exclusivity is gone... only just a memory for Facebook old timers. Also only a memory? "The facebook guy".

It makes you wonder: how much further is Mark Zuckerberg going to take Facebook? How much longer are we going to be a part of this? Good for him and how widely he'd expanded his company. But the world is so connected via the internet nowadays, that perhaps the only other option now is to disconnect. 

On a surprising turn of events, however, with the release of David Fincher's 'The Social Network' people like myself that have debated deactivating facebook (only to reactivate it again) find themselves reminded of the fact that WE as a people, as THOSE first million college students, contributed to Facebook's success. Success that's warranted expansion, expansion that has spurred competition (Twitter, Tumblr etc) and mergers, works of literature (in praise or scathing), and more recently, a film. An engaging one at that... generating well-deserved Oscar buzz.

It's come full circle now. 

Sitting in that movie theater watching previews roll as movie patrons trickle in finding their seats, think about how these people have at some point accessed Facebook and how big of a deal this all really is.

I almost forgot. At this point, I'm torn between pride and awe AND disappointment and boredom. Well connected as we are, Facebook isn't as special as it used to be. 


Or maybe I'm just being a snob.

Hiding

Foolhardy

Escaping reality

Concealing truths

Repressing pain

Losing faith

Fading

Fearing the inevitable
Aching for redemption
Reaching out for comfort

5 months and 8 days later

in May, I'd written about how I'd started another skin maintenance regimen using Proactiv Solution...  A desperate time called for a desperate measure when my body didn't respond as well as I'd liked from re-acclimatizing to the US after having spent an extended Christmas break in the Philippines.

 -- I wrote about that here and clearly failed to write much else about it --

5 months have passed since then, if I counted right. My skin has been relatively "clearer" for the past month or so thanks to a much-needed visit to Kate Somerville, as per my sister's request, and my almost-religious use of the Proactiv Solution system thinger majigger.

I'm really quite pleased with myself.

My immune system crashed when I returned to LA in February and I got sick to the point that my whole body was disoriented and my hormones must have gone all sorts of ways causing a massive breakout and relapse of acne that regular cheaper dermatologist visits in Manila helped to clear up


I meant to keep this on my tumblr page and it may seem a bit of an overstep considering I've kept the content of my tumblr as far away from my personal life as possible but more and more often the people I seem to be following and/or the people following me tend to make use of their own tumblr as an outlet for their personal rants and raves.

There's a part of me that wants get more personal there and to hopefully shed some light on people as a reminder that behind all the posts, likes, reblogs, creative tumblr handles/URLs, we're all normal people and perhaps some days, I also want to share my triumphs and maybe even failures just as some people have done.

My copying and pasting this here should be enough indication that I ultimately decided against it, maybe in time I'll grow more acquainted with certain people but yessss I hope I don't end up jinxing the progress of my skincare.

♫ Eargasms

I have been bumping to this all day but I feel so disappointed in myself for not knowing about this dj sooner. hanging my head in shame.

MUNK is a group formed by Italian-German dj Mathias Modico and my mind is just being blown:

La Musica

La musica 
divertente 
la gente sorridente 
le ragazze 
al dente 
il DJ stupefacente!

holy writers block batman!

...my prose has gone down the shitter.

#redcardhomophobia

the ONTD_Football livejournal community has recently banded together in an effort to rid football/soccer of prejudice towards homosexual futbolistas.

a single livejournal post has literally called for even more social media outlets to spread awareness:

• on livejournal
• on facebook
• on wordpress
• on twitter

members have been encouraged to get the word out and to also contribute their own ideas as to how to do so off the internet. i'm personally awestruck with how creatively proactive people can be:

and i personally think shirts like this ought to produced. fast.

in the past few days since the community's brainchild has been born, more and more football fans have submitted photos of themselves in their favorite team jerseys holding placards expressing their disdain for homophobia prevalent not just among clubs and national teams but also among their fans.

seeing as the past week has been alight with EPL, La Liga, Champions League, and Europa League matches among others, RedCardHomophobia is also fast becoming a staple on twitter, as moderators continue to encourage using the #redcardhomophobia hashtag in futbol-related tweets.

here's to the continued growth of this effort to put an end to homophobia in the beautiful game.

mich araullo

proper words can't possibly describe how proud I am of Mich, an old grade school friend. she's always had an eye for pretty things and was one of the more girly-girls back in the day, little did i know her passion would take her this far and so quickly.

i unfortunately won't be seeing her new collection until i return home for the holidays but this video will have to suffice until then.

individual photos of featured pieces here. can't wait to invest in more mich araullo designs!

audio track is CRAVE YOU by Flights Facilities (feat. Giselle). have a listen here.

一つだけ願いあるんだ：

家に帰りたいんだ。。。

friends and fashion

where is it written that friends have to dress alike?

doesn't a friendship consist of total understanding and acceptance of each other? shouldn't people be comfortable enough with one another to feel confident in sticking to their own individual styles?

or are photos i see of people on certain social networking sites just photos of people who really just haven't grown into their own identities yet?

i'm a nonconformist by nature, and complacency is not written on my to-do list but that's not to say i like to force that on other people... it would be the biggest hypocrisy. what i would like to see, however, is more people being comfortable in their skin or choice of clothes.

where's the fun in growing up if you keep restraints on yourself?

random thought

What I love most about flying back home to Manila, more often than not, are the stopovers.

Can you blame me? our international airport is the very epitome of disrepair. an architectural representation of the state of our country if you will. when you arrive, it's like you've been caught in a time warp into the 60s...

the worst thing about it isn't even the fact that it's very badly maintained but the fact that we have 2 other newer seemingly efficient airports. 1 of which is used solely for Philippine Airlines flights -- reasonable -- and the other, i don't even know what the hell it's being used for but the government spent a couple million billion pesos or dollars to build it so it needs to be put to better use before it erodes.

back to my point:

What I love most about flying home to Manila besides actually going home are the stopovers. 

I've had recent stopovers in Tokyo and Taipei.
I have yet to make stops at Incheon or Honolulu or Guam.

there's a sweet unexplainable sensation in layovers. as if you're stuck in limbo, suspended animation, until you reach your destination - mentally and physically.

I usually take full advantage of the time I have to explore the airport, eat the food, and use the wifi (which only really actually applies to Taoyuan. Narita doesn't offer free wifi)  and make smalltalk with people who clearly have been itching to be home as well.

The very prospect of being home again makes my insides all tingly and warm.

I can't wait until I step out of the airport doors to be enveloped by the humid Philippine air and until the moment I'm caught in my dad's embrace.

wow i feel like shit

there's nothing like a random conversation with a good friend to put things into perspective.

not enough haircare but i try

i've learned the hard way that it's never a good idea to entrust your hair to a female hairstylist. it just doesn't work that way. women are better off getting their hair styled by gay men or seemingly more metrosexual-than-usual japanese men.

the last haircut i had was in january before i'd left manila to return to los angeles. since then, i've made two or three attempts to trim my own bangs and to color my hair black which eventually faded to a purple mahogany to just brown and brassy.

mid-august i finally decided to get a haircut. i figured i needed to with the beginning of a new semester looming and the prospect of meeting would-be employers. made my way out to a japanese hair salon here in west la and left with my head feeling lighter.

hair by Taiga-san

day after

goodbye brassy tips (for now)

unfortunately, i didn't have the time or money to get my hair professionally colored where i got the haircut that this week i decided i'd do the color myself. unknowingly, i purchased hair color meant for gray hairs. all the better, it worked perfectly. and now i have a natural colored head of hair.

never underestimate the power of japanese beauty products. 

now i just need a hot oil treatment. or several.

who needs hugs when you've got tears to shed

earlier today, i was on the verge of a nervous breakdown but the feeling gradually dissipated after i allowed myself to burst into tears.

when did crying become my outlet? my catharsis?

outward indifference doesn't always mean a person doesn't give a shit

there are pros and cons to refusing to wear my heart on my sleeve:
pro: i'm better at keeping my emotions in check better than most people

con: people almost always assume i couldn't be bothered to react

pro: i can be a pretty good liar

con: i can be a pretty good liar

DIE DEUTSCHE NATIONALMANNSCHAFT

object/s of my distraction and affection.

Deutscher Fußball-Bund.
Their black kits/jersey.
Their camaraderie.

World Cup 2010 South Africa.

Just like the rest of the world, I have no proper words to describe the flurry of emotions I have been immersed in this past month. I just know something has to fill the void when I won't be hearing the vuvuzela buzzing anymore.

Will be starting a Brazil 2014 Fund.

FAO my Schwarz

i remember when Toy Story used to scare me. now that i'm older & have a deeper appreciation for the art & production behind any animated creation, i have nothing but praise for Pixar and the time they've put into warming our hearts with the Toy Story trilogy. Thank you.

to whom it may concern [or not at all]

my posts hardly count as good work. 

if anything, i actually believe my writing has been sloppy -- not that blogging should be compared to substantial writing.

gaddamnet. blogging shouldn't even be used as a verb. just like texting. 

okayimdone.

i have 7 posts pending. 7 posts i've managed to put aside because i can't seem to gather my thoughts... emphasis on "thoughts" i suppose... but i do remember being much better at prose and even poetry at some point. that went down the shitter. DAMN YOU UNI LIFE.

circle lenses

they make you look downright cute.

ever wonder how some japanese magazine models have babydoll eyes? not just due impart to faux eyelashes and strategically drawn liquid eyeliner, but also due to CIRCLE LENSES.

if you've walked into a Don Quijote or ドンキ in japan (perhaps even in hawaii), you'll have come across a section consisting only of colored contact lenses. and not just any of those ordinary acuvue-ish colored contact lenses but actual fashionable colored contact lenses in just about every color you could imagine. they're larger than normal too by the way.

purple.

blue.

green.
gray.

brown.

hazel.

black.

yes black.

and the bigger they make your irises look, the better.

the cuter.

most definitely.

i love them.

i'm a fan.

i got them in brown.

Geo Angel Color Brown Circle Lenses.

more daring women out there will opt for purple or blue.

i wouldn't mind other shades of brown or black to be quite honest.

i wouldn't encourage regular use of these type of colored contact lenses or dependency on them but they definitely add a je ne sais quoi... okay no that's a lie. i know exactly what. it calls attention to a certain allure in your eyes and face. 

unless you want to brighten up your eyes a bit, i wouldn't suggest purchasing a pair.

if you do enough research on Google or Bing, you'll find that you can order pairs online. but do remember to canvas for prices first and compare shipping fees appropriate for your delivery address.

i ordered my pair (and it won't be the last time) from mycirclelens.com. they seem to have some choice of colors and styles to choose from. 

most websites will provide before and after photos for reference. 

but it will really be a matter of your personal taste coming into play.

enjoy! happy purchasing!

eye on the prize.

is it bad that the one goal i have right now is to return to tokyo?

i want nothing more than to touch down at Narita with a student visa. can't express how much i regret botching the opportunity i had that winter and summer in 2007 but there really is no point in looking back.

my stepdad asked me earlier today what i was studying for and i really couldn't admit that i've been dead set on getting enough school done so i could transfer to a university in japan. 

i left my heart there.

i've only just realized that...

and i intend to reunite with it.

2011.

来年東京へ戻るよきっと。

上智大学

♫ Eargasms

couldn't keep it at a bare minimum:

we've all made time to appreciate Calvin Harris.

how about i give another reason to continue doing that:

Ready for The Weekend (David Spoon Remix)

i'm several months behind in discovering interest in the track but who the hell cares.

it's sunday afternoon btw.
Find the humor in that.

DAY 1

I'm back on the Proactiv Solution regimen.

If anyone has known me long enough, they will have discovered my lifelong battle with acne. And I've had to tolerate different dermatologists and stick to several kinds of treatments to keep acne breakouts at bay.

One of which I'd fallen prey to was Proactiv... After some time, I suppose my body grew immune to the medicine. 8 years later and I'm giving it another shot.

Acne is incurable, whether caused by genetic makeup or lifestyle. But it can be controlled.

My blemished skin has always been the main reason for my occasional bouts of low esteem. and usually encourages my dependency on makeup though i realize that actually clogs up my pores, adding on to the problem. Bad enough redness and inflammation really show on my skin tone and complexion.

Jumping back on the Proactiv train is an attempt to substitute the regular dermatologist appointments I would be making if I were home in Manila. Seeing as I can't afford to see a dermatologist here in the US, let alone LA, a trusted treatment will have to suffice -- even if it is solely advertised on cable television.

Received the package in the mail earlier this morning.

Ordered the 5-piece Total Plus Solution with Advance Blemish Treatment for $29.95. 

Thank the internet gods for Paypal.

Here's to hoping I get good results and avoid looking like an unhealthy wreck.

I'll be taking note of the progress (or God-forbid, the lack thereof) from now on.
Let's see how this goes down.

24kt gold to go

expect more info on The Emirates Palace, soon.

snazzy digs

is it a house?

is it a trailer?

is it an egg?
is it a pod?

just kidding.

makes for a rather interesting, if not bewildering, living situation.


captured by Belgian photographer Frederik Vercruysse.

BLOB
dmvA architects

dmvA,

young Belgian architects and their firm described as follows:

They achieve durability by respecting program, budget and context, and by displaying advanced ideas on the use of materials. dmvA is not focused on one particular style. They act like screenwriters, turn the program into a screenplay, spaces into sequences and so allow the building to each time tell another story.They don’t want to be profiled as mathematic theorists, but as designers whose motives are emotion, involvement, art and sex. Their work may be characterized as plastical, strongly detailed architecture in which maximalism has been accomplished in a minimalistic way.

awestruck, i honestly am reminded of the japanese capsule hotels and their utilization of every nook and cranny available. in that respect, the design really messes with your depth perception.

i've been looking at these photos for hours and i still can't gauge its size in proportion to an average adult.

photos from desire to inspire and frederikvercruysse.be

quoted text from world-architects.com

♫ Eargasms

click.

listen.

save.

vote.

Some Chords (LightsoverLA dubstep remix)

VOTE

Click on the heart.

Tweet the track.

Share on Facebook.

PIMPIN FO SHO

ch-ch-check 'em out.

Budding haafu model in Tokyo and a fellow ISM alumnus, Kelley McLaughlin:

check out her ameblo and please don't be intimidated by her use of Japanese.

also, someone you ought to be familiar with is my sassy older sister Xeng Zulueta. a renowned makeup artist in Manila having trained under Shu Uemura . she's even graced the cover of the PI's more racy magazine publications.

on her motherfusser blog, she offers tips and recommendations on how to look your best year-round and with what -- whether you're on a budget or not.

photos from Kelley's ameblo, and Xeng's facebook profile.

♫ Eargasms

Feel-good song of 2010.
Officially released in January of this year but first debuted last September 2009.


Pursuit of Happiness (feat. MGMT & Ratatat)


chorus lyrics are as follows:
I'm on the pursuit of happiness and I know 
everything that shine ain't always gonna be gold 
I'll be fine once I get it, I'll be good

manila is my home

diyos ko 'day.

how i miss seeing the fray on streets of manila through this window shade sitting in the backseat of a chauffeur-driven car.

for the meantime, i have to endure being my own driver..... not that i don't enjoy it but i do miss other such spoils of the philippines: our mini schnauzer Charlie, excellent beyond amazing home-cooked meals, and seeing my dad off to work then greeting him as he returns. not to mention, an affordable night out and doing away with designated anything. ha ha.

TOP GEAR LOVE

would have loved to be part of the convoy this Aston One-77 led.

read all about it and more photos here.

muito saboroso!

after Mothers Day lunch on sunday along Main St. in Santa Monica, we walked past this truck:

serving lime sorbet and advocating a movement to change the label of a Brazilian liquor from "rum" to sugarcane extract or simply just cachaça. a matter of semantics really but a big deal nonetheless. 

Leblon is an alcoholic beverage that will sneak up on you btw. 

have a go, join their movement and check out their website for drink recipes.